Denme a una jovencita que hará milagros para el señor..

Alohaaaaaaaa mi familia!!!!! Comó estan?

This week has been just a rollercoaster for me because well all I can say is that I do not know which is harder....is it harder to be told by our investigators that they do not want anymore lessons or is it harder to tell your investigators that you can´t teach them anymore....this week we had to decide to stop teaching one of our investigators and in fact we had him date to be baptized this coming saturday, but it just could not happen. It broke my heart of how hard we worked to teach him and really it just became something else. I can not really say the details, but the spirit really told us we needed to discontinue our visits and teachings with him. It was the hardest and by far the scariest thing I have ever done...so far that is. 

Because we had to go through this....my companion and I were sincerely saddened...in fact we cried so much and had a hard time sleeping because of it. But we were having such a hard time with trying to understand the promptings of the spirit because in fact we were just so confused if we should continue teaching him or just drop it....then we dropped it. Inspite of this challenge that we faced, we have always maintained our faith through it all. We kept telling each other, its okay....after this God will give us a miracle...(Alma 26:26-27). That night we cried and cried talking about our day and how terrible it was. Plus that we were told that we needed to look for a new house within the next four weeks...which also includes a new pensionista for dinner meals. Our stress levels increased to the max....

We kept the faith going...we did...we prayed ernestly and frequently that God will give us comfort and protection. The very next day, we had miracles. I had the feeling that the spirit was telling me to call one of the references we had two weeks ago, who we couldn´t visit because of other things to do...and when we called her, she said that she was so happy that we called and that she was actually waiting for us to call. It was really a miracle. Then after that we visited a señora that we recently contacted. Our first visit with her was amazing......she has such a beautiful spirit. That day we worked so hard...we had 9 appointments in all. It was amazing...we NEVER have that many in one day because they either aren´t in their houses and we can´t find them or just things get in the way for ejemplo...tramites (visa stuff). I can really testify that God gives us afflictions to humble ourselves and to learn something that we need...and after we show our faith and grattitude, He blesses us and gives us success. My companion and I were talking that very night and seriously, she is amazing...she is not perfect but she has a big heart for the people here. She keeps telling me that I am her best and favorite companion...lol. She told me how scared and how she felt uncapable to train me (I am her first daughter, greenie), but I was able to make it less scary...in fact fun hahaha. She said I was able to teach her to be more positive and happy and loving. It made me feel so good to know that I am doing something right...really lol because I feel that I do not do much when there is a language barrier. I am just so glad that I get to have her as my trainer and very first companion here in Bolivia.

So this week are cambios. Last night we were waiting for our leaders to call us to tell us if we have cambios. I was SOOOO SCARED. Because I did not want my companion to leave me and also I did not want to leave our area just yet. But it so happens that we don´t have cambios. We have four weeks left together in fact. This cambio is only 4 weeks and the next one is 8 weeks. Usually its 6 weeks but since we are getting a new mission presidente after the few cambios (yo creo), everything is changing. We have about 15 sisters and 10 elders coming this week. Its crazy! The mission has opened new areas. There are so many missionaries in our mission. Its incredible! 

Que más.......oh many people keep telling me that my accent is really good...like really good that they mistaken me as a Latina. But I have a hard time believing that when I struggle to explain in spanish certain things. But its better. Its mejor. Poco poco....really little by little. jajaja I make three months in the mission next week! It really goes by fast. I will be sleeping and I´ll wake up and think, Oh gosh itsFriday?! Oh so I ate raw saimin yesterday because I missed Jesse so much and I am running out of money for the month so I ate what we had in the house. And I think my companion thought I was weird to eat like that but its whateves lol. I do what I like. jokes. 

I am learning to pray with more heart and to humble myself....and that noche de hogar that we had with president dyer and his wife? It was great! I was honestly nervous because I never speak in Spanish with President because well I only had one interview with him so far. So I had to teach in front of him too with my companion....but it went great! :) I feel pretty blessed!

We are hoping for more milagros, miracles, more investigators, and more assitencias a la iglesia this week. Ayeeeee its so hard to type and speak english when spanish words are popping in between. Imagine my diary....oh my diary! I was reading my very first entry last night and it just made me smile. It says: "It begins at home. Surrounded by family, filled with the spirit and the love of God. This is such a big step for me to take and its scary. President Hafoka steps into our home and the spirit grows stronger. He shares his testimony and gives the advice that every missionary would need. "Its normal." he says. "Its normal to feel scared, anxious, nervous, or any types of feelings of anxiety". I felt like he was reading my fragile soul just at the verge at tears. I was scared. Bolivia? Cochabamba? Colombia? Millions and thousands of miles away from home. From mom, from dad, from Gabriel, from Jesse, from Marvy...even Tofu (my pet fish). Friends are leaving for their missions or have already left. How do they do it? Get over these feelings of fear?..." Then I write about D&C 84:88...."Now I am at Gate 17. Wet eyes. Running nose--its my cold..I can´t help it. And I feel nothing but so much love. Saying Goodbye to my family was hard, but I knew that everything would be okay. Mom shared a wonderful reminder to me...a story that Lolo shared with us. It was about two little boys in the premortal existence. ...this is missionary work....How am I feeling? As of now...I am calm and at peace. And now I´ll enjoy my last hour in Hawaii at gate 17."

These feelings of anxiety never really end....but then I think about the plan of salvacion and our purpose here on earth. We face these feelings of opposition to help us learn and grow...and as well to rely on the Lord to help us through them. To be honest....every cambio I know I will be scared out of my mind. It was just like receiving a new mission call. You don´t know where you are going or who is your companion. Especially as I am learning the language...the feelings come and go...but with the spirit I know that I can do it. The spirit and the love of God really comforts me through it all. Every time I pray and after I pray, I feel the peace that I need. 

Really I miss you guys so much and I do not want to imagine that day when I go home because I want to take everything opportunity I have here to make it last and worthwhile. 

Here is my fav quote in spanish:

"Denme a una jovencita que ame su hogar y a su familia, que lea las escrituras diariamente y medite en ellas, que tenga un testimonie ardiente sobre el Libro de Mormón; denme una jovencita que asista fielmente a sus reuniones de la Iglesia, que se gradúe de serminario, que haya ganado el Reconocimiento a la Mujer Virtuosa y que lo luzca con orgullo; denme a una jovencita que sea virtuosa y que haya matenido su pureza personal, que no se conforme con menos que un matrimonio en el templo y yo les daré una jovencita que hará milagros para el señor, ahora y en las eternidades". --Presidente Ezra Taft Benson

Les prometo que las promesas en el Libro de Mormón que les dice....son verdaderas. Dios les bendicirá si somos fieles y obedientes....se que eso es la verdad. Tenga fe y recuerde que nunca estamos solos...

les quiero mucho!

Hasta proxima vez!

Hermana Santeco